I am optimistic.
I tell myself
That (the things) I have hidden far too much
For far too long
Deep within metaphors and wordplay
In both poetry and prose
(it is time for me to change. the first of january shall mark a new beginning. i shall mark it on my calendar. i shall mark it on all my calendars. 12am, january 1. 12:01am, january 1. 12:02am, january 1. i shall mark it on all my calendars. december 25th and december 31st)
(Are) just excuses
Small ones, bundled together
With strings of half-truths
The water of guilt and fraudulence
Keeps them alive
(only for me to discard them later, usually. the problem is - i now have no bin i can throw them in. instead of letting them rot, why not use them? my supply is endless, as is the number of arrows in my quiver - apologies; it is not mine, i have merely borrowed it; should i pass it on to someone more deserving? no; that is entirely within my jurisdiction. use excuses if not i, who will?
.too backwards think to us for sense makes it - days these backwards is everything since
.excusation the, correctly more, or; justification the comes then, action the comes first)
As am I;
I will be optimistic -
(As was my optimistic optometrist, but never mind that)
Let me wrap these bouquets
Upon which have been written all my inactions,
Reactions, redactions, conniving fractions
That work so hard to misrepresent,
That work even harder to force the reader to
And news is not normally about interpretation.
(is mind my tangled quite a but mess nobody knows; hope people i do now; be quite it'll liberating
the of walls rattle words my brain; earlier of it out weren't getting they; are but they now!)
I must confess
I have not been entirely honest
No matter how hard I try
To get rid of my mask,
It had always remained -
Maybe that will change.
Perhaps this will be my Christmas gift.
That would be nice.
If this will be my Christmas gift
Who is my Secret Santa?
Maybe it's me.